By Sarah Jane Bailey
During a recent conversation I had with a client, we were discussing her plans to return to work. Her “chosen profession” was not considered an essential service, so her return to work was part of the first phase of returns.
We were conducting our appointment via ZOOM, and when she told me “they are making me returning to work SOON”, not only did her throat constrict but her eyes about popped out of her head….. panic was all over her! As her coach and trusted advisor, I couldn’t let her breeze past this moment!
“Can we just sit here for a minute? Three things, that I observed, just happened in this very moment! First, you said that ‘they’ are MAKING you return to work, second your eyes are popping out of your face, and third your voice is constricting….. stay with me! What is happening, friend?” I asked.
She went on to describe the life that she was living prior to being told to GO HOME. She was in an environment where her co-workers complained NON-STOP, they talked behind each other’s backs, they bad mouthed their clients, and they were just a ‘toxic’ bunch. Doesn’t sound like a very enticing environment to return to, does it?! She went on to talk about how much she feels that she doesn’t fit that life, and that being away from that environment only made her feel that more. When they said, “it’s time to resume life”….. what life was she supposed to resume? Can you feel her?
My heart was filled with compassion and love for this amazing woman, who was risking an immense level of honesty. She was putting it all on the line, and she was trusting me to help her to unravel the ball. I could feel inside of my heart, mind and body just how much she was white knuckling her life. She had been doing all the right stuff, but she was sinking inside of the “right stuff”.
In the Prologue of her book “Untamed”, Glennon Doyle describes a trip she took to the zoo with her wife and daughters, and time they spent at the Cheetah run. She describes the life of a yellow lab named Mini, and a cheetah named Tabatha. She describes the friendship between the two, and how Tabatha was raised with Mini since they were babies. The goal was to tame Tabatha and teach her to live more like the lab, Mini. Glennon takes us through an imaginary conversation between herself and Tabatha, describing the words of Tabatha as she looks at her life saying; “something is off about my life…. I feel restless and frustrated, and I imagine that everything was meant to be more beautiful than this”.
This is probably the greatest description that I have heard of the stirring that is in each one of us when we realize that we are living inside of an undesirable diversion, rather than inside of the potential of the amazing adventures that our lives are intended for.
I understand the fear, or challenge, of realizing that we feel stuck, just like my client (and Tabatha) described. I have been there…. You? I have had times in my life when I felt a stuck-ness when I was trying to live up to someone else’s story of me or up to the demand of the environment I was in. I have felt that I had to be so responsible that my desires were deeply buried, and my life felt bland, rather than vibrant and full of energy. But, what do we do about it? We feel all the feelings, but then what?
One of the very best, and most effective exercises I personally use, and I use with my clients, is visioneering. This exercise doesn’t always feel easy, but once we start, it is incredibly effective and revealing. The goal is to uncover to yourself the “YOU” that desperately wants to be brought to life!
Here’s how it goes: first, give yourself a dedicated time and space to get very quiet. Have a journal and a pen, and begin with the words “I am so happy and grateful now that I am…..” As you begin to write, the goal is to write the story that you desire, rather than writing the story that you don’t want. Here is an example of how I begin. “I am so happy and grateful now that I am a coach to amazing women who are creating the life of their deepest, most beautiful desires. The women I work with design their most delicious, pleasurable, enlightened, productive, happy lives, and as a result we all experience abundance in every area of our lives.”
Here is a very exciting truth! Whatever you desire for yourself in the secret places of your heart, is yours for the creating. Just like Tabatha, the cheetah, there is a unique and beautiful “something” that is in you for the revealing! If we can imagine it, the universe invites us to create it. By writing our stories, we begin to see the picture that we may have pushed down for a long time!
One of the most wonderful things that I have learned during my own personal visioneering is that I am WORTHY of the greatness that is seeking expression. Marianne Williamson says it perfectly in her poem “Our Deepest Fear”: “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.” Beautiful ones….you are powerful beyond MEASURE, and the invitation being extended to you, with great love, is to move fully into your greatness! It’s yours for the creating!
To connect with Sarah Jane Bailey, please email at: email@example.com